Love is in the Sidebar...

Facebook wants me to feel the love.
Seriously, Facebook would like for me to get out there and get my groove on.

Since I changed my status on Facebook to 'single', which I failed to realize would go ANYWHERE except on my 'About' page, I have gotten all of the Facebook fun. No more ads for Gout treatments, no more Scientology cruises or suggestions to follow the Number One Glutenologist.

Thanks spelb.com for the cool hearts...

Nope, I get the looove. I get Zoosk.com. Zoosk promises me fun even "if I am frustrated with online dating." And I get to join for free since I am an XX chromosome holder. It also has a pic of an officer, so I don't know if I am supposed to drool or sit up straight and act like I haven't been drinking wine while surfing the intertubes.

Next, I get Fitness-Singles.com. This one promises me pictures and profiles of local skiers. And love. Funny thing is, it has a picture of a guy in a Speedo. I know it has been warm this winter, but that is some wonky skiing attire, stud muffin.

Then I get TEXTYOUREXBACK. "Learn fifteen ways to get him back." This ad comes complete with a wide-eyed psychotic man staring feverishly at his phone. This ad actually looks more like 'fifteen ways to get a restraining order slapped across your face', but maybe I just misread signals...

And of course, the ubiquitous match.com ad. You'd think match.com would've blocked ever doing anything anywhere near me, as much fun as I have made of them after they matched my ex up with my bff... Nope. there is match.com, with a promising picture of a shirtless firefighter in suspenders. Because that actually happens in real life, right?

Just when I start to taste a little vomit from Facebook throwing all of this on my page, I see the ad. THE AD. The one that advertises the local liquor outlet with 'cheap wine' specials. Now this is an ad I can curl up with in front of a cozy fire...